What I Went Through Yesterday — Turning Pain into Surrender
- karenjuly1965
- Jul 16, 2025
- 3 min read
Repentance tells us what to turn from.
Faith tells us who to turn to.
Salvation isn’t just praying a prayer—it’s a surrendered heart.
It’s turning from sin and turning to Jesus. That’s true salvation.
Yesterday, I felt the sting again.
Not because I’m grieving Rob being in heaven—I’ve come to rest in that. But because of the ache that rises when I see what I can’t have… a companion beside me now. Someone to laugh with, walk with, share life with. The ache of being known and wanted—not just for how I make someone feel, but for who I truly am.
And for a moment, I was tempted to believe the lie that maybe someone could fill that space. Maybe he could. But the truth came clearer: this man didn’t want Jesus, and he didn’t want me. He wanted the version of me that made him feel better about himself. That’s not love. That’s ego.
And God, in His mercy, met me in that painful clarity.
It hurt—deeply. It opened up that human part of me that still longs for connection. It made me wonder if I’m too much, or not enough. But instead of trying to explain my heart to someone who didn’t want to hold it, I took it to the only One who never grows tired of listening.
I sat under the stars and prayed, “God, help me.”
And He did.
He reminded me that some things are not mine to keep—not even to hope for—because they are not heaven-sent.
I realized:
What we allow into our inner circle can be a trap—not a gift.
We can fool ourselves into thinking someone is the answer, just because they mirror a place in our heart we thought was healed. But God knows the deeper truth. And His love protects us from walking into what would burn us—mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually.
Spiritual truth from Philippians 4:6:
“Be careful for nothing; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.”—Philippians 4:6
But in everything — Surrender it all. Leave nothing outside His hands.
By prayer and supplication — Supplication means humble, earnest pleading. It's not demanding. It's trusting.
With thanksgiving — Gratitude changes the posture of our heart and affirms we trust His answer.
Let — God gives us the choice. He won’t force our surrender. But when we do, peace follows.
We prayed…
We thank You, Father, for Your wisdom and the truth in Your Word. We know things, but we need wisdom that is pure from Heaven to know how to proceed. Pure wisdom does not leave us double-minded about wanting God’s help to change our mind.
We see that darkness undermines itself and brings chaos and confusion. We know that in Your light, darkness has no power over us.
Unite us, Lord, to stand firm in Your truth. Remove any division among us. Fill us with Your peace and Your love. Strengthen us to walk in Your light—this requires us to expose our hearts to You and see if there is anything impure in us.
Bind us together by Your Holy Spirit to be disciples of unity and stability, reflecting Your glory in all we do.
May our lives shine so brightly that darkness cannot prevail. Your kingdom is revealed through our lives.
Come back tomorrow:
Learn how to walk forward when the path is unfamiliar
but God's voice is sure.
🔗 This devotion is part of the When You See, You Have a Choice series.
Join us as we learn together and walk closer with Jesus.
Each devotion in this 7-day journey has a matching Bible teaching and Heart Moment to help you grow in Scripture and walk stronger in surrender and trust.
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